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Story published on January 7, 2010

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Southampton Man Gets Penis Stuck In Metal Pipe

by Edgar Allan McAbe
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An unnamed man in Southampton walked into Southampton General Hospital on Tuesday morning with his penis stuck inside a stainless steel pipe.

Medics at the hospital were unable to free the organ as the man had a permanent erection caused by the pipe restricting the blood flow. Hampshire Fire and Rescue Service were called to help remove the pipe from the man’s engorged member, and they had to use dangerous engineering equipment to cut the man free.

Doctors used local anaesthetic on the man’s John Thomas before the firefighters set about the steel pipe with a four inch grinder. After 30 minutes of careful cutting the patient was eventually freed from his embarrassing predicament with just a slightly bruised reproductive gland and ego.

“It was a very delicate operation that required a very steady hand and the crew was worried about things getting too hot during the cutting.” A Hampshire Fire and Rescue Service spokesman said.

“It’s certainly an unusual call-out and I’m sure the man won’t be getting into that situation again.”

The man offered no explanation as to how he got his penis stuck in the stainless steel pipe, which was similar to those used in the manufacture of vacuum cleaners.

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