Piping The Truth Into Your Brainballs!
Story published on December 19, 2009
A supposed big cat stalking the Crystal Palace area of South London has been spotted again earlier this month.
Martial arts expert Roger Fleming told the Croydon Guardian that he fled from the beast like a big girl when he spotted it late at night on the 9th December.
“I looked down the hill and saw something moving in the shadows about 20-30 metres away. I thought it must be a fox, but then it walked under a street light.” The tough guy explained.
“It had the head and shoulders of a cheetah, and it was brown. It locked on to me, and I just started running for my life. It chased me for about 30 seconds.”
Mr Fleming said he was so scared that he couldn’t perform his duties properly the next day at his job as a building manager for Chrysalis Music.
“I’ve done martial arts for 20 years, and I’ve never felt so weak and useless in my life. I thought, ‘this could be it’.” He said.
Mr Fleming had been out late at night in a secluded woodland between College Road and Sydenham Hill jogging with his dog, that is when he spotted what is known as the Sydenham Beast.
The Sydenham Beast first came to light in March 2005 when a man reported being attacked by a large black cat. In August this year journalist Helen Barrett reported how she and her family were forced to run from the creature when it approached them from bushes.
Most big cat experts say that these animals are usually harmless, but in this case it might be that the Sydenham Beast is so accustomed to humans it doesn’t fear them, and joggers may be on the menu if there’s a harsh winter and a hungry panther prowling South London.
FEATURES AND ARTICLES
Arse Wiping ~ A Brief History
Anyone remember Izal? The tracing paperesque bog roll which smeared rather than cleared excrement from the bunghole and felt like a demon kissing your anus?
Speak Your Brains
Have your say in our superb forum.
Competition
This month The Morningstarr* is giving away a swearing turtle!
SUBSCRIBE TO OUR LATEST NEWS HEADLINES VIA EMAIL
POP CULTURE NEWS
Summer Glau Joins ‘The Cape’
Summer Glau, star of Firefly, The Sarah Connor Chronicles and Dollhouse has been signed up to play a lead role in NBC’s new superhero show The Cape.
Watch Kate Nash’s Brand New Video
Kate Nash is back on the music scene with a brand new album set for release next month.
Star Trek Hottie Joins Conan Cast
Rachel Nichols who played Gaila, the sexy, green-skinned alien in J.J. Abrams Star Trek has been cast as the female lead in the forthcoming Conan remake.
RELATED STORIES
LATEST NEWS HEADLINES
ALSO IN THE NEWS
Fish Boy14 month old Song Sheng from Jinhu, eastern China is known as Fish Boy to the locals after he began developing fish scales on his skin.
Doctors believe that the little boy is suffering from a rare condition called Lamellar ichthyosis, due to a lack of pores in Song Sheng’s skin he is unable to sweat [...]
MORE STORIES
Trial Begins For Satanist CannibalsSPEAK YOUR BRAINS
Have your say at the Morningstarr* ForumContact Us
If you have an unusual, bizarre or strange story then we would like to hear about it. Please, drop us a line.MORE NEWS HEADLINES
Sponsor: