The World’s Fattest Man

by Edgar Allan McAbe

48 year old Paul Mason from Ipswich is officially the world’s fattest man weighing in at a tremendous 444.5kg, or 70 stone.

Fatty Mason relies on a team of seven carers to wash him, possibly using flannels on sticks, whilst he reclines in bed playing video games all day and watching television. The rotund fella requires an inflatable slide to slip him out of his bed and into a wheelchair so he can be pushed down to his local fish and chip shop. Bob Singh Phagura, who runs the Nacton Road Fish Bar in Ipswich told The Sun that Mason would visit his takeaway every Friday, accompanied by his carers and order vast amounts of deep fried grub.

“He would wait outside as we couldn’t fit him or his wheelchair into the shop.” Mr Phagura said.

“His carers would take away the food. It was ten times more than a normal person would eat. He would order four large cod, two pies, four battered sausages and six large portions of chips, along with mushy peas and curry sauce. He’d wash it down with a couple of bottles of Coke.”

He would wait outside as we couldn't fit him or his wheelchair into the shop

Mason’s monstrous eating habits literally ate his mother out of house and home. Paul had moved back in with his mother Janet in their family home but his enormous appetite meant Janet had to remortgage the property to feed him, and we she couldn’t keep up with the repayments the pair were evicted and the house repossessed.

Janet died six weeks ago but Paul has been relying on benefits for the past few years, the cost of caring for him and feeding him has cost British taxpayers £1 million.

Now, after years of gorging himself on pies and chips it has been decided that Mason requires a £20,000 operation to save his life, and a Chinook helicopter may be required to airlift his fat arse to the hospital.

Comment

Read All Comments

FEATURES AND ARTICLES

Arse Wiping ~ A Brief History
Anyone remember Izal? The tracing paperesque bog roll which smeared rather than cleared excrement from the bunghole and felt like a demon kissing your anus?

Speak Your Brains
Have your say in our superb forum.

Competition
This month The Morningstarr* is giving away a free, freakish, Face Bank money box.

SUBSCRIBE TO OUR LATEST NEWS HEADLINES VIA EMAIL

SIGNUP FOR EMAIL DELIVERY HERE:

POP CULTURE NEWS

Hayden Panettiere Threatens To Release Album
With Heroes struggling with poor ratings, and the rumours flying around again that the show will not return after it finishes it’s latest season on NBC this week, Hayden Panettiere may have enough time on her hands to complete the album she’s been working on for the past three years.

Gimli Joins Legend of the Seeker Cast
John Rhys-Davies who played Gimli the Dwarf in all three Lord of the Rings movies has been confirmed as a guest star on Legend of the Seeker.

More Garbage
Shirley Manson has hinted to fans that her band Garbage will be reforming and releasing new material, for the first time in five years.

The World’s Fattest Man

THE MORNINGSTARR* © 2006-2009