Piping The Truth Into Your Brainballs!
Story published on June 8, 2009
Former home secretary David Blunkett was attacked by a cow this weekend as he walked through the picturesque Derbyshire countryside with his guide dog Sadie.
Blunkett, Member of Parliament for Sheffield Brightside, was celebrating his 62nd birthday on Saturday when the angry cow charged him in the middle of a field. Brave Blunkett tried to protect his canine companion but was trampled to the ground by the vicious bovine and suffered a broken rib.
The MP told The Sun “I let go of Sadie and she shot off. But the next thing I knew, I’d stumbled to the ground and the animal fell over, too.
“She hit my side and broke my rib. Had her full weight of around a ton hit me, I’d have been a goner.
“I know the public are furious with politicians, but I didn’t realise the anger has spread to Britain’s cow population, too.”
“A few more inches and Labour would have been facing another unwelcome by-election in my Sheffield constituency.”
FEATURES AND ARTICLES
Arse Wiping ~ A Brief History
Anyone remember Izal? The tracing paperesque bog roll which smeared rather than cleared excrement from the bunghole and felt like a demon kissing your anus?
Speak Your Brains
Have your say in our superb forum.
Competition
This month The Morningstarr* is giving away a swearing turtle!
SUBSCRIBE TO OUR LATEST NEWS HEADLINES VIA EMAIL
POP CULTURE NEWS
Watch Kate Nash’s Brand New Video
Kate Nash is back on the music scene with a brand new album set for release next month.
Star Trek Hottie Joins Conan Cast
Rachel Nichols who played Gaila, the sexy, green-skinned alien in J.J. Abrams Star Trek has been cast as the female lead in the forthcoming Conan remake.
Fringe Renewed For Third Season
Fox have today announced that the amazing J.J. Abrams sci-fi show Fringe will be getting a third season.
RELATED STORIES
LATEST NEWS HEADLINES
ALSO IN THE NEWS
Woman Finds Snake’s Head In Packet Of Frozen BeansErnestine Jamison from Houston, Texas was disgusted to find the severed head of what she believes is a snake in a packet of frozen vegetables.
Mrs Jamison, a mother of four, was preparing dinner for her family when she spotted the cold blooded critter’s decapitated bonce in amongst the green beans.
“I saw something in there I [...]
MORE STORIES
Topless TobogganingSPEAK YOUR BRAINS
Have your say at the Morningstarr* ForumContact Us
If you have an unusual, bizarre or strange story then we would like to hear about it. Please, drop us a line.MORE NEWS HEADLINES
Sponsor: