Story published on May 10, 2009

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Another Stripper And A Fart Musician Appear On Talent Show

by Peter Jolly
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ITV television show Britain’s Got Talent was supposed to herald a new age for wholesome family entertainment and a return to the variety performances on a Saturday night that were popular in the heyday of light entertainment.

In reality it’s rapidly becoming a kind of freak show, with act after act of nudity and filth. Making it a must see recommendation.

Last nights programme saw a selection of male strippers, scantily clad acrobats, a burlesque dancer and best of all the legendary Mr Methane!

Methane has been performing for years, he started performing around 20 years ago and claims to be the world’s one and only profsesional farter. His act comprises of performing cover versions of well known songs using his backside, basically he farts in tune. He’s already made numerous TV and radio appearances after he became popular as the support act for punk rockers The Macc Lads.

Disgracefully Mr Methane did not make it through the auditions, he was booted off the show by miserable bastard Simon Cowell. Scottish burlesque dancer Daiquiri Dusk fared better though, the winner of last years Ministry of Burlesque and Bizarre Magazine’s Battle of the Burlesque competition managed to impress the judges with her sexy routine, and also left presenter Ant McPartlin feeling a bit flustered.

“When I walked off stage Ant couldn’t keep his eyes off my boobs. I love to shock-and I loved his reaction.” the 24 year old said.

“I’ve no idea if I’m Ant’s kind of girl but he was definitely ogling me-the cheeky boy!

“I just thought it was really funny because I used to watch them on television as a kid.

“Then there he was unable to speak to me because I wasn’t dressed.

“I just thought, ‘For goodness sake, get a grip!’ It was very funny.”

The redhead appeared on the show dressed as a traditional Scottish dancer, but quickly shed her clothes to reveal her tiny St. Andrew themed briefs and nipple covers.

Here she is performing a demonstration of her tassel twirling at the The Rockaburley New Year’s Ball 2008/09.

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